So I should preface this post with the fact that I wrote it maybe two months ago. I actually referenced these feelings in a post about learning to take constructive criticism (MY NEED for this). I wasn’t ready to hit post then, because I was writing this in the heat of the moment and I wanted to make sure I read it with a clear mind before I published. With that said, two months later, I’m dusting it off out of my drafts and clicking publish, because it’s my hope that if I needed it, maybe someone else does? And if not, then 2 Timothy 3:16 and we’ll call it a day 😉 .
One morning this week I felt like I needed an EXTRA dose of Jesus. Actually, there’s a blog post just in this because often when I feel that way, spiritually dry or just upset from something, I’ll *add* to my morning devo, because I’m really not good at sitting and just praying. #Thingstoworkon.
But anyway, I’m not mad I added this morning, because it was clearly what I needed. God was like hey, I want you to read THIS this morning too. So there ya go. I had a few rough days with a particular person, and it left me feeling sick over things. I’m not really one of those people who can shove things off easily. And not necessarily meaning I hold grudges, I just think the situation over and over and beat it to death, analyzing why they were wrong and hoping to God I didn’t act a fool in the process of being upset about it.
OK too much? I’ll skip to the Jesus part. I’m currently doing the Roman’s study on SheReadsTruth, but sometimes when my heart is torn over something, I take out my Jesus Calling book. This is how I *added* to my devotion. It seems to get down and dirty (I don’t really know if those are words that should be used with scripture, but I digress…) and I swear, usually hits the nail on the head for WHATEVER is going on at the time. The scriptures listed were: Luke 6:37, Timothy 4:8, Titus 3:5, and Romans 8:1.
A few pieces that hit me:
-Do not Judge (Luke 6:37).
-‘He saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy…” Titus 3:5.
Then I moved into my regularly scheduled SheReadsTruth devotional for the day, reading Romans 11:25-36 and it tells me…starting at verse 30:
“For just as you were at one time disobedient to God, but now have received mercy because of their disobedience, so they too have now been disobedient in order that by the mercy shown to you they may also now receive mercy.”
Now, not to leave this out of context, and I am NOT a theologian by any means, but this part of Romans is talking about the Jews v. Gentiles.
However, taking the core of that scripture out, I heard, “you received mercy, and so do they”. Insert in my Journal *Blank Blank-insert name here* gets mercy, too.
Not just me. That person, too. Duh, right?
It’s so easy to believe that the next morning when you’re by yourself, reading scripture. Not so much when you’re caught up venting about the conversation over and over again. Or right in the middle of the converstaion, choosing facial expressions while it’s actually happening (whoops).
We hear over and over again about how God gives us mercy. And we need to give ourselves some grace, for sure. We are sinners and that’s why we need God and his mercy. But sometimes I think I forget that I have to extend that too. I was pretty upset with how this person dealt with things. Part of that is a personal problem of obsessing over things and not wanting to let them go. “Let go and let God” I swear is the truest phrase ever. But seriously, did I think grace and mercy were just for me?
And then I thought, oh geesh if I get his mercy, how much more should this person. (Romans 8:3).
And so I leave this devotional and this blog post rightfully convicted with a few points:
1) Not to judge/Do not condemn/DO Forgive: (Luke 6:37-Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.)
2)I am not saved because of what I’ve done. But because of mercy (he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy…Titus 3:5)
3) But I am free, I am loved, and I am saved(For there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus Romans 8:1).
4) Grace on grace on grace. For me, too. This is a dual battle in my mind. I don’t want to give that person grace, hence the inspiration for this post. But I often don’t want to cut myself slack, either. I go over these situations in my head a zillion times wondering how I could have dealt with it better. Not that it’s bad to reconsider things to handle them in differently in future situations, but hashing them out was not learning for me. It was beating myself to the ground.
So today I leave with a little extra grace for myself, and for the other person. Because there needs to be more grace extended.
I feel like there’s a lot of garbage coming form holier than thou christians. So I hope this post leaves someone knowing that 1) No christian is perfect. Far from it. and 2) We need saving and grace and that’s WHY I call myself a christian. And I need to extend that to other people because I’m no different (Romans 8:3).